Patterson Hood discusses Southern passive-aggression, Roger Daltrey, Pete Townsend, Robert Plant and the art of rock God aging, and plays his excellent new tune Jimmy Page.
If i was Jimmy page I’d woo you with my double-neck guitar and my prowess,
if i was jimmy Page I’d conjure up my voodoo and put a spell on you,
and Know just what to do
If i was jimmy Page I’d live in a castle and do magic in the tower,
If I was jimmy Page I’d show up most everywhere but if you came looking for me,
You would never find me,
I would drink whiskey from crystal glasses,
Do my cocaine off of strippers asses,
While you’re sweating with (indecipherable)
Teenage girls with backstage passes,
I’d have risky sex with exotics,
Do my drugs from rosewood boxes,
I’d fly to New York City,
in my private plan,
I’d show up most everywhere in cardigans and silver hair,
I’d live in a castle, but record in Headley Grange,
If I was jimmy Page I’d take you anywhere you wanted to go,
I’d never pay the fiddler, i’d play my Les Paul with a bow,
If I was jimmy Page i would wear those dragon pants everywhere,
You’d see me in the check out line, I’d always be in front,
If i was Jimmy page I’d woo you with my double-neck guitar and my prowess
If I was jimmy Page